visingsö
really tired this morning - started working in an enormous series of clover fields with jess and tina today. i guess i'm not really going to be working with tom and gisela anymore. had special k red berries, apelsinjuice and coffee for breakfast, all of which wreaked havoc on my bladder come 10:30. walked over kumlaby church, hoping for a bathroom which luckily i found. i wasn't prepared to repeat the cow and a haystack incident in albania. long day of work, but nothing out of the ordinary. i'm determined to start biking more frequently, so i walked one of the two functioning bikes over to the cottage so that i could go for a ride after a cup of coffee. aimlessly fooled around on my computer - i'm really lacking direction today and i'm exhausted or thirty md. fifteen minute nap, read for twenty or thirty minutes, bringing me up to rivendell in the story, then had some much needed coffee. afterward, i went on a short yet vigorous fifteen minute bike ride which brought me back just in time to start dinner before the boys came over. not quite enough falafel for everyone, so i threw some sesame nuggets in the mix, but at least there was enough pita bread to go around this time. no more material to exchange with hans and it is really starting to feel like he is actually leaving soon - this will be the peak number of people here at one time. the turn over of workers and students and their staggered arrival and departure dates is a little odd, but the company is good while it lasts. read more after dinner and then pestered billy in hopes that i could hear from him before i crashed. yesterday really took it out of me - i don't know if it is psychological or physical, but either way i'm bearing a weight on my shoulders. i got a little upset (okay, more than a little) at billy - he didn't respond for a while, right until i was going to bed, his connection was shitty, and i was harboring resentment that he updated his facebook status and posted on nhc about getting the job at broadstreet without ever telling me! i helped him prep for his interview and everything and still i didn't merit a message or a tweet, something. i just miss the days where he would write or message me constantly, when i had constant reminders that i was on his mind - he is always on mine. yeah, we overdid it in the beginning, but now that we are back to long distance, at least for now, i just want to hear from him all the time - at least for the big things. sometimes a broken connection over skype isn't enough and it hurts my heart.
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