hey, give me space so i can breathe

ugh, weirdness. i just realized that my ex-boyfriend looks exactly like my favorite musician/hero...and acts like him too - except less mature. it is seriously creeping me out. i like ~dated one of my idols without knowing it for a year. totally taints my perspective on things.

bored bored bored. anyone want to do something this weekend? because friday through sunday = nothing for me to do. maybe i'll go to jackson...or elsewhere...? i mean, i lay out by the pool for a couple hours every day now...so its not like i can just do that all weekend either, so enticing as that sounds. truth of the matter is i will turn into a lobster if i keep that up...i hate being fair-skinned. well, minus the freckles. i like the freckles.


okay, so my laptop is officially frustrating me now. first, it is constantly buzzing - maybe because my memory is almost full from music/photos? idk. i mean i have an external and i have dumped all my archives and a lot of stuff i don't listen to on it (like i'm talking over 300 gig...i mean, over a period of time but you get the point) and there really isn't much for me to move off because i'm constantly working with or using what's on here. oh, and my computer almost ate shit a couple of weeks ago because i got a virus (the long and the short of it, i'm an idiot) and i had to try and keep it on until my dad could work on it so that it wouldn't further embed itself, etc. etc. and i changed my power settings to save battery.

which leads to frustration #2 - now my computer screen goes darker whenever i'm running on battery, and brighter when it's plugged in...but the problem is, my charger is ghetto-tastic and you have to plug it in just right for it to charge now - so if i move at all or the charger shifts, my screen toggles back and forth between light and dark. and if you didn't put two and two together that means it is happening all. the. time. and since all my work and meaningless time wasting is based around the computer, it is annoying the shit out of me.

so i gave up on the fountainhead for the time being. switched over to middlesex, which is much less tasking. i don't have the will-power to voluntarily conquer another book over 700 pages at the moment.

oh, word of caution. unless you really really want to get my latest piercing, don't do it. it hurts. all the time. and is swollen. all the time. i always hate myself for getting cartilage piercings and end up cursing my stupidity, but this one is by far the worst. my fucking industrial was a walk in the park compared to this shit. go get an industrial, not a snug. seriously.

one thing i did accomplish today, beyond my inane, mind-numbing data entry and research at TCB, was finally sending out some of the "I Will Fight" wristbands. some people were asking around about where they could find one since they have lost or snapped their old ones, but they have been out of production for a few years now. but some nice people made another lot for me to sell at millsaps for a fundraiser, and we had some left over so i got around to dealing with orders/sending them out today. yay for raising more money for cancer research :) nothing is more satisfying than helping a cause, even if it is only a few bucks.



"Then she moved to LA with her firefly stare,

and you loved sunset strip when it sparkled,

you grew up and you sparkled but why don't you care?

[. . .]

So why do you leave these questions unanswered?

The circus awaits and you're already gone.

My Cheshire cat doorstop with fear in your smile,

what makes it so easy for you to be walking by?

[. . .]

Where can I go that your pictures won't haunt me?

What makes it so easy for you to be walking by?"